My Birthday in Tanzania

So they made my birthday really special...  Barb and Mac from Arizona gave me cookies and a clif bar :) and ma ma Jan picked some beautiful orange flowers for me, and after dinner Eliudi surprised me with a kanga for my birthday that says "In everything you do put God first" in swahili...  It's white and blue... very beautiful...

and God showed me something on my birthday...  I was listening to my mp3 player and journaling when a song came on... I don't know how it got on there or who it's by but it's beautiful!  It is called close your eyes and the chorus goes a little something like this...

"Close your eyes this time,

cause trust is all we have tonight,

but trust will be forever.

Safe your dreams will be,

cause trust will be the light tonight,

so close your eyes this time.

Trust will be your light tonight,

so close your eyes this time."

And I have been realizing that through some things that happened when I was younger I had developed some trust issues...  Which God is now helping me to get through and He was showing me how it was effecting my relationship with Him.  So He spoke to me and said,

"You asked me the other day what I thought of you.  Well, I have a perfect plan for you that includes your healing...  Trust me...  Psalms 139"

and for those of you who don't know... this is psalms 139:

(I"ll bold the parts that really hit home for me so you don't have to read it all...  :) )

O Lord, You have searched me and known me.

You know my sitting down and my rising up;

You understand my thought afar off.

You comprehend my path and my lying down,

And are acquainted with all my ways.

For there is not a word on my tongue, But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether.

You have hedged me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me.

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;

It is high, I cannot attain it.

Where can I go from Your Spirit?

Or where can I flee from Your presence?

If I ascend into heaven, You are there;

If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.

If I take the wings of the morning, And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,

Even there Your hand shall lead me, And Your right hand shall hold me.

If I say, "Surely the darkness shall fall on me,"

Even the night shall be light about me;

Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You,

But the night shines as the day;

The darkness and the light are both alike to You.

For You formed my inward parts;

You covered me in my mother's womb.

I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Marvelous are Your works,

And that my soul knows very well.

My frame was not hidden from You,

When I was made in secret,

And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.

Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.

And in Your book they all were written,

The days fashioned for me,

When as yet there were none of them.

How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!

Depart from me, therefore, you bloodthirsty men.

For they speak against You wickedly;

Your enemies take Your name in vain.

Do I not hate them, O Lord, who hate you?

And do I not loathe those who rise up against You?

I hate them with a perfect hatred;

I count them my enemies.

Search me, O God, and know my heart;

Try me, and know my anxieties;

And see if there is any wicked way in me,

And lead me in the way everlasting.
(I'm sure this is part of why David was a man after God's own heart!  What a man!)  :)

I was crying so hard when I was reading this!  It was amazing!  I can't even describe it because God has been showing me stuff too about how amazing it is that no matter what country you go to, this God the one true God is always the same!  from country to country!  what an amazing God we serve!  I listened to that song over and over and over again... Just thinking about how this God that has a perfect plan for me, even down to bringing things that I need to deal with from the past one by one.  I can trust him.  I can.

Asante sana Ba ba!

With Peace and Love,

Live,

AMber